The kitten Chronicles - part 80

The Kitten Chronicles is a brilliantly crafted piece of writing (well, OK brilliantly crafted might be a stretch. How about a not too many typos piece of writing?) This is because I write it at work. Heaven help the poor sap who tries to write at my dining room table. As soon as I sit down one kitten or another leaps up and lies directly on the paper I'm writing on - I move him discreetly aside and then he swipes at my pen as I try to write desperately. Then if I make the mistake of trying defend the pen - aha! - the kitten knocks down my unguarded beer bottle. It's like chess - but with much messier consequences. My train of thought is constantly being derailed. I put one kitten back down on the floor and the other one jumps up to take his place. They're like tag-team wrestlers." Tag, go get him brother, give him the choke hold!". And who can blame them? Kittens are illiterate. They can't appreciate the artful combination of verbs, nouns and a lot of showy adjectives. Hell, they can't even find the litter box (well, in fairness one of them can't - Rooney are your ears burning?) In order to get any work done at all I must distract the fur-faces by running the water in the sink. Last night I managed to crank out 12 TV scripts in this manner. My water bill is going to be
positively brutal. Eek! xxx dad